I’ll admit it. I didn’t know you could negotiate a salary when I started working. I thought the number in the offer letter was carved in stone. Employers give, and you take with no conversation around it. But when I became a recruiter, I was shocked when a candidate pushed back, and my boss was okay with it: companies actually expect you to negotiate. 

In fact, some have budgeted extra if you do ask for more.

Do you want to know the truth? Salary offers aren’t always the maximum employers are willing to pay. Many companies set aside extra money for high-value candidates who negotiate. 

If you don’t ask, that money stays in their pocket. 

Sure, the company will smile and say, “Welcome aboard,” but internally, they’re thrilled they hired great talent without paying top dollar.

Why Job Seekers Don’t Negotiate (and How to Get Over This)

So, why can salary negotiation be so intimidating? For many, it comes down to fear. 

Fear of rejection. 

Fear of being seen as difficult. 

Fear of losing the job offer altogether. 

These thoughts are common. Yet,  they’re often rooted in myths rather than reality.

For example, some people believe negotiating will make them look ungrateful. But think of it this way: if you were doing the hiring, wouldn’t you expect them to know their value and advocate for it? Yes. Hiring Managers don’t get bent out of shape when you negotiate; instead, they see it as a professional conversation they expect to have.

Others worry they’ll do poorly in the conversation because they don’t know what to say. Here’s a secret: preparation is your best friend. 

Practice your ask. 

Know your value. 

Research industry salary ranges. 

When the time comes, take a deep breath and remember that you’re not asking for something forbidden—they invited you to this conversation by making you an offer.

One of the most powerful mindset shifts you can make is to think of negotiation as a collaboration, not a conflict. You and your new boss are not adversaries. You’re working together to find a win-win solution for both sides.

You Need to Reframe the Conversation

1. It is a Value Conversation: Consider what you bring to the organization instead of worrying about how your request will be received. What skills, experience, or knowledge make you uniquely qualified? You have value. Believe it.

2. Preparation Brings Confidence: Confidence comes from preparation. You'll feel more in control if you’ve researched your market value and can explain why you’re asking for a certain number. I recently took a job seeker through this exercise so she could explain how she came up with her ask.

3. Practice with a Friend: Rehearse the conversation with someone you trust. Practice with different scenarios: someone willing to hear you out and someone who pushes back. Know what you will say in either case. That way, you won’t become flustered. 

4. Think Long-Term: Salary isn’t just about today but your career trajectory. Every negotiation builds a foundation for future raises, promotions, and even retirement savings. A $1,000 increase in starting salary could result in $500,000 additional earnings over a career.

Do This During Salary Negotiations

Many people have studied negotiations, including salary negotiations. Use techniques that have a great chance of success.

1. Show Enthusiasm

It’s important to show enthusiasm for the role throughout the conversation. The employer is more willing to work with you if they feel you want the role.

• “I’m excited about this opportunity and know I can make a big impact. I am looking to find a salary that works for both of us.”

This keeps the tone professional and collaborative.

2. Embrace The Silence

Silence can feel awkward, but it’s your secret weapon in negotiations. After making your request, resist the urge to fill the silence. Employers often need a moment to process. When you speak, you start to undermine your position. Silence gives you power.

• You: “Based on my research, I hoped for $145,000. Is there flexibility in the offer?”

• Hiring Manager: Pause

• You: (Remain quiet!)

That pause makes the employer feel they need to respond.

3. Ask Questions

Asking thoughtful questions shows you’re collaborative and open to dialogue. You are not demanding anything. You are trying to understand. Some examples include:

• “Can you share how the salary was determined for this role?”

• “Is there room to adjust the offer based on my skills and experience?”

• “If the budget doesn’t allow for a higher base salary, are there other benefits we could discuss?”

Questions like these shift the tone from confrontation to problem-solving. You are more likely to get engagement from the employer.

4. Use a Range Instead of a Single Number

If you’ve done your research, come prepared with a salary range that reflects market data. For example, if you’re targeting $130,000, say:

• “Based on my skills and the market data, I was thinking of something in the $130,000–$145,000 range. 

This approach allows you to get an offer higher than what you were willing to take.

5. Highlight Your Value

Tie your ask to specific achievements or skills. Instead of simply stating, “I’d like $130,000,” try:

• “I believe $130,000 reflects the value I bring, given my experience in project management and my achievement of delivering $2M+ projects on time and under budget for my employer.”

This reminds the employer that you’re worth the investment.

6. Be Open to Creative Compensation

If the employer can’t meet your salary expectations, explore other perks that add value, such as:

• Signing bonuses

• Extra paid time off

• Flexible work arrangements

• Professional development opportunities

• Stock options or profit-sharing

For example, you could say:

• “If you can’t budge on the starting salary, I’d be happy to discuss additional PTO or additional learning opportunities.”

7. Have a “Walk-Away” Number

Before negotiating, decide the lowest salary you’re willing to accept. Sometimes, the offer is too low and won’t meet your needs. Be prepared to walk away. You can say:

• “I appreciate the offer, but I was hoping for compensation closer to [your target]. If that’s not possible, I understand. I would be interested if other opportunities become available.”

Walking away shows you value yourself. You will not be taken advantage of if this employer wants to offer below-market.

Now Do This With Your Next Offer

I didn’t know I could negotiate early in my career, which disadvantaged me. I left money on the table, which I could have used as I started my career. However, when I learned I could (and should) negotiate, I always got something extra. Sometimes, it was a higher starting salary; sometimes, it was a perk like attending industry conferences.

I was never pushy in these negotiations. I always approached them as a conversation about how we could achieve a win-win result. This helped me to feel confident and ask for my worth. Follow the advice I have here, and you will feel the same and get similar results.